Jesper Juul
  • ”When nothing else works,
    try telling the truth about yourself”

  • ”Children do not need to be raised or brought up, they need empathic guidance."

  • ”Be careful about making playtime into a duty. Play with your child and see if you find it meaningful.”

  • ”One has, quite frankly,  to be prepared  to let the child enrich ones life, even when it hurts.

  • ”All children truly want to give their parents what they want.
    We presume they don’t, but they really do.”

  • ”Show children the same kind of respect
    that you would show an adult.”

  • ”We don’t talk about helping. We talk about taking responsibility. Help can be bought down- town.”

  • ”If you have children who are going through or have passed puberty,
    you should not interfere with their lives, uninvited.”

  • ”Developing a relationship doesn’t necessarily need to take long,
    it depends more on a mental priority.”

  • ”The instant you get divorced, you lose the right to interfere with the other person's personal and private life.”

  • ”What made it possible for you to survive as a child,
    makes it difficult for you to live as an adult.”

  • ”There is just one ambition important to parents: get to know your child as much as possible.”

  • ”Stop being so frustrated, instead think: This is the man I have, this is how he is.
    Do I want to live with him or not?”

  • ”Children don’t need as much attention as they demand!
    It’s okay to say 'No'!”

  • ”There is only one reason why children lie:
    They experience that their parents can't handle the truth.”

  • ”The quality of our relationships has very little to do
    with what we do and a lot to do with how and why we do it.”

  • ”You have to trust children to do their best, but that doesn’t mean that they always
    do what you think they should do.”

  • ”Children don't need to be raised,
    they need empathic guidance as they grow.”


Welcome to Jesper Juul's official website

Jesper Juul  was an internationally renowned public speaker, author, family therapist and educator with activities in more than 15 countries around the globe.

Jesper Juul has been the founder and leader of Family-lab International– an organization offering seminars, lectures, workshops and counseling to parents and families, public organizations as well as private enterprises.

To many Jesper Juul is best known as the author of “Your competent child” (1995) where he summarized his 25 years of experience working with families and challenges many major assumptions of traditional developmental psychology as well as the dominating models and methods of pedagogy and childrearing. His findings has since been confirmed by both neuroscience and relational psychology and constitutes the basis for a new paradigm and perspective in the study of and principles for dealing with families as well as the interaction between children, youth and adults.

Jesper Juul has over the past two decades formulated a new paradigm for the way we see children and the ways in which we try to support their development and socialization. His main objectives were to inspire, help and support parents and professionals in order to ensure that new generations of children can grow up with a maximum of social- and mental health by offering alternatives to the many violent and abusive ways in which children and youth have been treated in the past as well as in the present.

After being the CEO of The Kempler Institute of Scandinavia for almost thirty years, Jesper Juul devoted his time to support and educate social entrepreneurs in many countries and to ensure that a new generation will develop his work and philosophy in new and inventive ways.

Jesper Juul was

  • Ashoka Fellow (Ashoka Scandinavia)
  • ”Honoraray member of SPA”, Society for Psychological Assistance (
  • Member of the board - Society for Childrens life-competence (
  • Senior advisor at FamilyLab Association (

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